40 People Share The Darkest Secrets They’ve Kept From Their Partners For Years

We all have bits of information about ourselves and things that have happened to us that aren’t shared with others. But then, when it comes to your fiancé or perhaps GF/BF, this is the one person you are naturally expected to trust before all else. However, should there be a boundary? One viral Reddit post has since recently proved that even the closest lovers keep secrets from one another. 

Redditor u/dusty_ninja took to the r/AskReddit Subreddit and asked: “What is the darkest thing you have kept from your partner? Instantly, responses flooded in, ranging from shocking and heartbreaking. Whether or not they ended up summoning the courage to tell their partners, these juicy confessions [compiled below] are also quite brutal. You possibly will attest to the mentioned above after taking a scroll through. Let’s ask: are you open to your partner?

More Info: Reddit 

#1

“I was crying and told my boyfriend someone had kissed me. He asked if it was his 30-year-old cousin. I said yes. He asked me over and over if anything else happened. I was 15. I said no. I lied.”

#2

“Declining mental health and everyday drug addiction. I wish I hadn’t been so good at hiding it. I needed help.”

#3

“I suffer from chronic depression. My S.O is super sweet and supportive, but I am afraid of unloading too much of my crazy on him. I keep dark thoughts and feelings from him all the time; I’d make him miserable if I didn’t. He knows, btw, I am not keeping all of it from him, just a lot of the excessive stuff.”

#4

“I’m not sure I actually love him, or if I just don’t want to be alone or start a new relationship from scratch.”

#5

“That the real root of my trust issues stem from how I was sexually assaulted by my extremely religious godparents’ son when I was 11-12. It first started out with comments about my body, how I was “filling out,” then it evolved from there. My parents would send me to their house for whole summers, and I particularly remember that one, my mom came to visit, and I practically begged her to take me home. She adamantly refused even after I told her I was not comfortable and was scared, and she still left me with them. I guess from there, I just slowly stopped trusting the ones closest to me.”

#6

“That I’m dying faster than she thinks I am.”

#7

“That I feel trapped and I hate myself and my life, and I really just want to disappear and move away and leave my wife and three kids so they can finally be free of me, I feel like such a burden and so guilty that my kids love me, they’d be better off without me.”

#8

“I never told my wife that her mother tried to have sex with me. It was early in our marriage when we were living with her to save money for our place. Her marriage of 28 years had ended badly, and she was emotionally fragile. She was very drunk and was absolutely horrified at what she had done when she sobered up. I promised not ever to tell my wife, and I never did, even when she and I were fighting near the end of our marriage. Some things are too cruel to do, even when you’re trying to hurt each other.”

#9

“I’m thinking of divorce. My wife is scared of me. If I am working on something and I swear or vent my frustration. She runs to me (usually I am alone) and wants to know how to fix it. Then she leaves the house when I say I am just mad that: I burned my hand. The toilet is clogged. I stripped a screw and need to drill it out. She told me this weekend that when I am mad, she gets scared, and that just broke something in me since I can’t fully process it. I don’t know why; I have never even raised my voice to her. But she cringes and covers her ears whenever a loud noise occurs. I spoke to my parents and friends; they think it sounds like she has been abused in the past. But she doesn’t want to talk about it, and when we disagree, we don’t even get to argue. She just locks herself away from me and our kids. We are in marriage counseling because I haven’t been happy for a long time. But she was arguing with the Therapist about what I really feel and how I should take vacations alone since I have had panic attacks on vacation before, and that ruins them for me (or maybe her). I don’t know what to do, but I am tired of walking on eggshells.”

#10

“My wife asked me not to pee in the shower. I told her I wouldn’t, but I do it every time I shower.”

#11

“I have anxiety attacks when my SO is away. We joke about me believing he’s dead when I don’t hear from him often enough, but it’s real. Like hyperventilating, heart racing, crying, rocking back and forth-real. He loves going on road trips and does landscape photography. I can’t ruin that for him.”

#12

“I hooked up with a professor of mine in college, and after that, she would pimp me out to her colleagues. That’s not the label she would have given it, but that’s what it was.”

#13

“I’m bisexual. I am able to talk about many morbid things I have experienced and witnessed, I could be open about how many girls I have slept with, but if the truth got out that I once had a boyfriend years ago and I still find men attractive, I am afraid that it will be over. I have experienced enough rejection from women whenever I opened up about my sexuality.”

#14

“Nothing dark, but I hide pints of ice cream in the back of the freezer. If I don’t hide it, then it’s gone. My girlfriend has 0 self-control and will eat the entire pint in one sitting. I like to spread it out so I can have an enjoyable snack a few days in a row. Sometimes I’ll even buy one with gluten in it intentionally so she can’t have it. She has celiac and can’t have gluten.”

#15

“I once pooped in their garage because I was waiting for her to come home and let me in. Blamed it on the raccoons.”

#16

“She’s my ex now, but she had just revealed to me some very, uh, confidential information, the info I understand I’m one of only four people to know. She asked me if I have any deep secrets like that. I lied and told her I didn’t, but the truth is, my grandmother, by marriage (no blood relation), sexually harassed and abused me as a preteen and teenager. Literally, nobody irl knows. I’ve never told anyone.”

#17

“I hate that she compares me to my ex-husband, and I have to prove her wrong over and over again… I hate that I have to pay for is past mistakes. Like ugh starting to wonder if I can keep doing this… I really do love her, but it’s making me depressed.”

#18

“He wanted to find a shark tooth so badly after I found one at the beach. So I went and bought a small bottle of shark teeth from the gift shop, spread them out all over a strip of beach we were hanging at, and marveled at every shark tooth he brought me. I can never tell him the truth.”

#19

“Not that dark, but I really did not like her wedding dress.”

#20

“She farts in her sleep like a wild bear.”

#21

“Got someone pregnant in high school, gave up custody so I wouldn’t have to pay child support. They all died in a car crash five years later.”

#22

“That I’m unsure if I will ever be able to express and maintain deep emotional intimacy with anyone.”

#23

“I was born with only one hand. I have rheumatoid arthritis in the one hand I have, and I know it’s spreading. I have osteoarthritis in my lower back and scoliosis to the point where I am most likely going to need spine surgery. I’m only 31 years old. I can’t do this for another 50+ years. I am in such bad pain now, and it’s only going to get worse. I have thought of suicide, but I can’t do that to my husband and kids. I don’t want my husband to turn into a caregiver. I can’t envision not being able to take care of myself.”

#24

“Her father once told me: if he could go back in time, he would never have dated her mother and have kids with her. Was a pretty shocking thing to hear while on vacation with the whole stepfamily. The guy has Asperger’s. Weird family. The girl left me cold turkey a few months later after seven years together, and I still didn’t even think about telling her that story.”

#25

“Not my GF now, but she didn’t know the extent or details of my childhood struggles. She knew I grew up in the projects until age 10, but I think because I never wore it like a badge of honor or carried myself in the stereotypical way of someone who would come from that environment, many people think I was unaffected. and I never bothered to share those details because I never wanted to make a sob story out of a situation that I was blessed to get out of and that many people are still currently in. but that living situation has taken a toll on me in various ways that’d I love to expound upon for those who are interested.”

#26

“I cheated on my wife…. when she wasn’t looking at a family potluck. My wife and her sister put their peanut butter cupcakes side by side on the table, and her sister makes crazy good cupcakes. My sister-in-law made peanut butter cupcakes with real peanut butter filling AND filled it with Reese’s Peanut Butter Chips. My wife only put a tiny bit of peanut butter topping on hers with no PB filling. I kept making excuses to go back to the dessert table and scarf down my sis in laws cupcakes, especially when little kids were near it to make it look like they were eating most of the cupcakes. Didn’t even touch my wife’s cupcakes.”

#27

“That I’m probably a bit co-dependent at this point.”

#28

“Just how much I depend on her. For our first, eight or so months of marriage, my wife and I were never apart due to moving around and being in lockdown. Even now, we’re hardly apart since we both work from home. She doesn’t know just how sad I get when she goes away. I miss her so much, and all I really want to do is curl up on the bed and wait for her to come back. I lose my smile; I lose interest in all my hobbies, everything. Once she gets back, though, I’m alright again.”

#29

“I ate all four sleeves of Oreos in one sitting.”

#30

“Sometimes, I buy a chocolate bar when I go to the grocery store and eat it before I get home.”

#31

“My mom hated my ex (let’s just call her Sarah) for how bad she hurt me when we broke up. My mom passed away about a week after seeing Sarah at the mall, and she gave Sarah dirty looks and a cold shoulder. Sarah and I saw each other soon after my mom passed, and she broke down and told me that based on their recent encounter, she was sure my mom hated her. I lied to her and said, “no, she was just really sick at the end; she didn’t hate you.” Sarah and I are still good friends to this day, and I will never tell her the truth that my mom hated her guts.”

#32

“This is from my POV, not Doofenshmirtz’s. My father is an AIDS patient; he did not reveal it to anyone and married my mom. And as a result, I was born unaffected; my mother also is unaffected. (happened in 2002). (To clarify the doubt from my father, a DNA test was performed, and I am his son but without the virus).”

#33

“I’m an iv drug user on and off. I work long contacts in isolation far away from home, and I use a lot when I’m away. I clean up when I’m going home, so my wife can’t tell, but I’m still not quite 100% when I’m home with her. She’s struggling with stuff, and it breaks my heart I can’t meet her needs, but I need this job to pay for our future. I’m trying to quit the drugs, it’s easy when I’m home, but as soon as I’m alone in this stupid little hole in the wall for work, four weeks at a time, I’m back to using. I don’t know how to tell her.”

#34

“That I had an abortion at 16.”

#35

“I’m from south Louisiana, and my dad is in a Mardi Gras Crew. Every year he’s on a float throwing beads. My husband has never been to Mardi Gras, so his first time, he was so excited, and it was at my dad’s parade. Normally people on the floats throw the “good beads” to kids or women that will flash them. I told my husband that if you yell “throw me something, mister!” loud enough, the people on the float will give you the “good beads. I told my dad, and he told his float buddies; when their float came around, my husband was screaming like a banshee, “THROW ME SOMETHING, MISTER! My dad and his friend pelted my husband with their best beads. When we were leaving the parade, my husband was flexing all his nice new beads and thinks Mardi Gras is the best thing ever. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that I told my dad to do that. He just thinks that because he was so enthusiastic, he got all the good stuff.”

#36

“That I’m scared of him.”

#37

“That there is literally nothing about myself that I actually like, and I honestly have no idea what he sees in me. All the men I’ve been with before him (only three) made it crystal clear they were with me because I was nice, supportive, safe, and convenient. Because I put up with [them]. They weren’t actually attracted to me — just what I could do for them. … It’s hard to build confidence when my whole life has been about what’s (objectively) wrong with me when everyone around me, including my romantic partners, compliment everything except my appearance. Now I’m in my mid-30s, and this is the first one who I think might actually be attracted to me. It feels too good to be true.”

#38

“Exactly how bad of a person I used to be before I met her. She knows I was into drugs and some other dumb stuff, but she doesn’t know the depths of depravity I delved to in order to fit in with the people I mistakenly wasted my time with.”

#39

“She doesn’t know I’m straight.”

#40

“I freakin HATE Dungeons & Dragons. It bores me to tears. Yet I’ve orchestrated an elaborate lie that gives the illusion I love it as much as he does, and once a month, I have to spend 5 hours sitting through a session bored to tears. I do this simply because it’s one of the few hobbies in his life he gets to enjoy, and I want him to have someone to play it with. It’s been going on for five years now, and I have no way out, lol. It’s OK though, the amount of joy I see he gets from playing it gives me comparable joy. So I don’t mind that much.”